“Hey Rocky! Watch Me Put My Head Up My Ass!”

There’s a website that sells targets to folks who fantasize about fighting a zombie apocalypse (like Dork Falcon and the other cosplay kids at LGF do). They sell mannikins on sticks as targets that bleed when you hit them. Kind of an odd niche, but big deal – it’s fantasy target practice.

http://zombieindustries.com/

Go ahead and take a look. It’s no more offensive than typical Halloween costume advertisements, but it’s an interesting niche indeed. It’s for people who want to pretend they’re shooting at imaginary demons in 3D rather than abandoned washing machines or paper prints of black silhouettes. Here’s the description of one of the targets for sale, named “Rocky”:

“A fighter from Detroit, Rocky got his nickname because of the odd shape of his face after a few matches left him a bit rutted in the head. It was reported that during an evening drunken stroll in the Brightmoor area, Rocky was attacked by a group of infected undead but was able to beat them off.  He did however, suffer multiple bites to his body and is now infected. Be warned, Rocky is HIGHLY dangerous due to his quick wit and strength… he was last seen screaming something like, ‘Zombie Industries believes in America!’ And that we do.”

Odd for sure, but so what? (Here comes the point.)

One of Charlie’s LizardLappers cherry-picked one target out of all of them and decided that it looked like The President Of The United States, claimed it has brown skin, therefore RAAAAAACIST. If that wasn’t ignorant enough, Charles endorsed it:

ZOMBIE TARGETS

Yikes, indeed Mr. Rumpswab.

ZOMBIE BAROCKY OBAMA

Yeah. And I’d venture a guess that most people looking at Little Green Footballs these days would see the likeness to a big steaming pantload of awesome right away as well.

IF THIS THEN THIS ZOMBIE

Charlie, nobody’s going to believe your vapid inanity unless we post a direct link, so here it is.  Suck it up, son.

Update: It appears that The Race Detective posted a comment on the “Rocky” advert page, preceded by underling lizard “mattand.”  Click to enlarge.

ZOMBIE CHUCK n MATTAND

h/t garycooper.

Update 2: Charles’ comment  got memory holed! Mattand’s comment survived, meanwhile two wags showed up. Click to enlarge.

ZOMBIE CROATOAN JACK A


The Ruse and Fail of Little Green Footballs: Part III – The Bannings

This is Part 3 of a monograph about a blog named Little Green Footballs and its founder Charles Foster Johnson. Click the links below for related posts. They will be updated as the series continues.
Prologue
Part 1 – Overview
Part 2 – The Ascendance of Charles Johnson and LGF
Part 3 – The Bannings
Part 4 – The Flounces
Part 5 – The Turnaround
Part 6 – Current Events & The Future Of LGF

Bonus track: Revisiting Rathergate

 

PART 3 – THE BANNINGS

Every blogger, regardless of the size or popularity of his/her blog, eventually will have to deal with a troll. It’s no fun when someone shows up with the intent to irritate everyone.[1]

[First banning, post-911, courtesy of The Boiler Room Crew]

No one would claim that Charles Johnson never banned anyone from trolling on LGF. Indeed one unpopular commenter was banned in April of 2005 for his/her continual “baiting” of other posters, often creating an incredibly hostile atmosphere. In addition, there were some posters who for one reason or another went overboard (especially when discussing Islam and the Middle East) and were told that they might be happier elsewhere. Fair enough.

Read the rest of this entry »


Rescued from Memory Hole: “Zombie: CAIR and ICNA Sponsor Islamic Ad Campaign”

Courtesy of The Great Strawberry Heist™, The Boiler Room Crew discovers another missing LGF thread:

littlegreenfootballs.com/article/32974_Zombie-_CAIR_and_ICNA_Sponsor_Islamic_Ad_Campaign

Pulled from the bottom of a bucket, we present article # 32974:

Here’s the link(s) in question:

Zombie has a post looking into who’s behind a new advertising campaign on San Francisco buses: Islam bus ads sponsored by CAIR and ICNA roll into San Francisco.

and

Also see: LGF search: “Islamic Circle of North America”


Rescued from Memory Hole: “The ‘Bush as Hitler’ Retrospective”

267 Charles Sun, Oct 4, 2009 9:55:49pm •
I may delete all my posts linking to zombie. What a back-stabbing little creep.

So said CJ in one of those sooper (not so) sekrit (but quite interesting) threads that he has a tendency to post up when he’s got something buggin’ him and needs a big hug (In the past, we’ve managed to inspire them a couple times, with our fact checks on the LGF “views” and “tweet” counters, specifically). This was a big one, as this long-time LGF staple and significant contributor made the fatal error of not censoring comments left on his/her blog. –gasp!

In the end, Johnson made good on it…kinda. The Great Strawberry Heist™ revealed that there are quite a few Zombie-linked articles down in the memory hole. But, search the LGF archives, and you’ll still find more of them left standing. We haven’t yet discovered the rationale for which ones were to stay and which ones went. Perhaps the selection was just random. Or maybe he was getting through a bunch of them and realized that to follow through on ALL of them would essentially turn his archives into Swiss cheese. Who knows? All we know is there are a bunch of them in our buckets, and The Boiler Room engineers thought it was worth a thread or two (or ten).

For our first feature, we resurrect the youngest of the disappeared threads (chronologically):

littlegreenfootballs.com/article/34449_The_Bush_as_Hitler_Retrospective

Evidence of this thread’s existence is found elsewhere, as a google search reveals that another blogger copied/pasted the post for himself.

BTW- The link in question:

Pictures to prove it? Zombie’s got ’em: Bush as Hitler, Swastika-Mania: A Retrospective.

Factoids: “Zombie” appears on our banned list, and his/her user profile reveals:

karma: 36977, comments: 30699, links: 76, registered date: “Jun 15” 2004 “9:45 pm” and was referred to on the front page as LGF “minion” and “operative” more than once.


(Finally) Rescued from Memory Hole: “Zombie: The Weather Underground’s Long Term Plan”

Last October, we featured a memory-holed thread from 2008 that we almost rescued: (Sorta) Lost to Memory Hole: “Zombie: The Weather Underground’s Long Term Plan”.  We proved without a doubt that the thread existed at one point (you can see the link to it here on memeorandum, for example), but we couldn’t manage to grab the full content.

Well, thanks to the great strawberry heist, The Boiler Room is pleased to announce that we can now display a full screenshot for this rather elusive LGF thread:

Because we should all have more strawberries in our diet…


Rescued from Memory Hole: “The Convergence of Socialism and Commerce”

Way back on the evening of Dec. 27, 2005, the LGF comment section was awash with disappointment. It seems that CJ had a technical issue with a certain thread, and none of the lizards were able to comment on it.  Apparently frustrated, Johnson set up a new open thread (“Tuesday Night Open Thread”, to be precise), and posted this:

Scroll down a little further, and you’ll find this gem from the enigmatic zombie:

Well, CJ must not have been able to figure out the problem, because that thread has remained in the memory hole for more than 5 years now.

Once found by The Boiler Room, however, it wasn’t a problem for us to breathe life back into it:

Yay! Zombie’s comment finally has a home!  After 5 years, this thread finally has a comment section that actually works!  And as a bonus, of course, everyone gets a strawberry!


LGF Karma Hall of Fame: “zombie”

Moving forward with the series, featuring comments ranked higher than CJ’s all-time high of 69

Electrocution Warning to Lizard Lurkers: The karma you are about to see is at a level that is well beyond your wildest upding fantasies (given the haggard state of LGF), so try not to get any drool or spooge on your laptop, OK? Diary of Daedalus is NOT RESPONSIBLE for any injuries which may result (directly or indirectly) from viewing the following karma score.

Featured today is a comment from 2008, from the enigmatic “zombie”:



From the thread: littlegreenfootballs.com/article/31332_Daily_Kos_Astroturf_Diary_Goes_Down_the_Memory_Hole

Status of Lizard: Blocked

All-time karma placement: 12th

Worth noting:  Zombie actually has three places in this rarefied karma atmosphere, having scored a 72 and a 70 as well.   Also, the story of zombie’s banning -including the contents of the relevant seekrit LGF thread- was documented by Nodrog here.


Rescued from Memory Hole: “Flight 93 Outrage”

((((((((THIS IS CHENZHEN)))))))(((((((REPORTING FROM THE MEMORY HOLE))))))))))(((((((PSSHHTT)))))((((((((((IT’S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT)))))))((((((PSSHHTT))))))(((((((THERE ARE MOUNDS OF COMMENTS AND LIZARD BODY PARTS EVERYWHERE)))))))((((PSSHHTT)))))(((((BUT I FOUND SOMETHING…BIG)))))))(((((TRANSMITTING NOW))))))

.


http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=17441_Flight_93_Outrage&only

.

(((((WHAT IS IT?))))))(((((((OVER?)))))))

.

http://web.archive.org/web/20071009151437/http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=17441_Flight_93_Outrage

.

((((((STANDING BY))))))

.

((((((TELL ME YOU’VE GOT SOMETHING)))))

.

.

(((((ANOTHER ONE?)))))

.

(((((PSSHHTT))))))

.

((((((IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE?)))))(((((OVER?)))))))))))

.

.

((((778 CASUALTIES))))

.

((((((TELL ME YOU HAVE RECOVERED THEM))))))

.

((((((MINOTAUR?)))))

.

.

(((((((((MY GOD))))))))))

.

(((((((((WE MAY HAVE FOUND A BROBDINGNAGIAN FACTCHECKATHON))))))))))))

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(((((((((PSSHHTT))))))))))))

.