The Drive-By Wit of Charles Johnson

157 Comments on “The Drive-By Wit of Charles Johnson”

  1. Bunk X says:

    Kamala put on an accent for Charlemagne – with “splain’ the rap” hand gestures. 😀

  2. poteen2 says:

    In that bottom GIF Charlie looks a little like Kim Jong IlL.

    • Bunk X says:

      Did you see that NorK is shut down for 11 days of mandated mourning for the anniversary of Dead IL? Anyone caught drinking or laughing gets disappeared.

  3. rightymouse says:

    Fatso has the wit of a twit.

    • rightymouse says:

      I still think he has Asperger’s Syndrome.

      The kids from son’s school who had Asperger’s were socially awkward and had strange concepts of humor.

      • Bunk X says:

        A kid with Asberger’s once came up to me and said, “You make monkeys cry.” I told him that I didn’t mean to and I was sorry. He accepted the answer and walked away.

        • rightymouse says:

          One kid with Asperger’s told me that my perfume stunk. I told him that was because he did too.

          • Octopus says:

            My Asperger’s encounter that sticks was a relative on my wife’s side, who was probably autistic – his thing was imitating people. He was a very gifted mimic. Caught a lot of people off guard. 😆

  4. rightymouse says:

  5. rightymouse says:

    You’re right! This is disgusting crap coming from the White House.

  6. rightymouse says:

    Getting ready for Xmas.

  7. rightymouse says:

    TRUE!! 🙂

  8. rightymouse says:

    Donkeys are such asses.

  9. windbag says:

    Charles’ drive by wit…you mean a drive by shitting?

  10. rightymouse says:

    Rather quiet here. 😦

  11. ISTE says:

  12. rightymouse says:

    Watch all the way through. 😆

  13. rightymouse says:

    Clogged toilet.

  14. rightymouse says:

  15. rightymouse says:


    • Octopus says:

      He’s not funny like death camps aren’t funny, or kids with cancer, or cages full of live dogs in Korean meat markets. His jokes make everyone sad.

    • dezzez says:

      The unfunny fat clown even retweeted himself hoping some of his followers would blow smoke up his ass.

  16. Octopus says:

    Fatass is talking about a Watters comment about wanting reporters to ask Fauci a hard question for which he didn’t have a canned answer ready. The idea he was trying to incite violence is ALMOST too absurd, even for the Idiot Left. 😂

  17. Octopus says:

    Now this is a dress! 🤪

  18. dezzez says:

    I have never seen a more negative, hateful, spiteful, miserable a-hole than Chuck, no wonder he is such a lonely hermit.

    • rightymouse says:

      He’s a mean atheist asshole.

      • Octopus says:

        Even atheists can enjoy Christmas, as a winter solstice party full of light, food, gifts and loved ones. Chonky can barely keep the lights on with his miserable failed hobby, he eats frozen fish and government cheese, gets no gifts and has no loved ones. He watches TV and tweets recycled glurge, 24/7/365.

  19. ISTE says:

    I wish Twitter did not exist. This is an example of images posted by a certain demographic of the gun and Taser Kimberly Potter had in her possession. How could she possibly mistake her Glock 17 for a bright yellow Taser that is fucking glow in the dark yellow!!!!!!

  20. Bunk X says:

    • rightymouse says:

      Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!! 🙂

      • Octopus says:

        It’s weird how different dogs respond to toys. Our old dog, Murphy, loved his stuffed animals and would keep them until they were too gross for us to handle – he usually put himself to sleep sucking on one. When we got him a new one to replace the gross one we tossed, he would walk around the house with it for an hour or so, crying with happiness.

        Current dog, George, has zero interest in toys. He likes food, naps, and petting. All day long, if he can get them.

        Daughter’s dachshund, Henry, destroys stuffed animals with his sharp little teeth as soon as possible. He’s a killer, who likes to see their stuffing spread around their limp empty hides.

        Other daughter’s German Shepherd, Alphonse, is similar to Murphy in that he loves his toys and keeps them together in a safe spot. He’ll take one out and chew it for awhile, sleep with his head on it, and then put it back with the others until it’s needed again.

        Later tonight is Henry’s birthday party, which will have a Hawaiian theme. All the dogs are invited, in proper attire. Leis will be provided. Coconut shell bras are optional.

  21. rightymouse says:

  22. rightymouse says:

  23. rightymouse says:

    My stress level went through the roof because Thailand has shut its doors again (except the Southern Sandbox) due to Omnicron. Fortunately, they decided to honor all the Thailand Passes (we have them) that were granted for Test&Go foreigners. We will be staying at a First class hotel, take a rapid test & quarantine for 24 hours. Then we’ll buzz around to see family & friends.

    • Octopus says:

      Omicron is a cold. This needs to stop.

      • rightymouse says:

        Exactly. Our house/dog sitter who has been vaccinated/boostered caught it. Sniffles, runny nose, sneezing, bit of a cough, elevated temp for a day or so & normal temp today.

  24. rightymouse says:

    Why is Philadelphia Cream Cheese in scarce supply? 😯

    • Octopus says:

      Homemade cheesecake? I think I’ll do one for Christmas. 😋

      • rightymouse says:

        I was lucky today. They actually had some at the grocery store today. 🙂

        • Octopus says:

          We have two packages in the fridge, as I was going to make a pumpkin cheesecake for Thanksgiving, but got lazy. Now I’m just going to make a regular one for Christmas dinner.

          • ISTE says:

            Who the fuck in their right mind eats pumpkin anything.

            It tastes of fuck all. The flavour comes from the spices you mix in.

            Having said that pumpkin spice mix is THE best stuff to use to season cabbage and beansprouts when making spring/egg rolls.

            And yes, I am a gourmet chef. I know the difference between a spring roll and an egg roll. Neither contain egg in the filling.

            They are identical except an egg roll is coated in egg before deep fat frying. Giving it a crispier outside texture.

          • Octopus says:

            Regarding Thanksgiving, my Thanksgiving Especiale Smoothie was a big hit on the family text-thread. It’s easy, if you have already made the whole traditional feast. If not, fuggedaboutit.

            – Scoop of mashed potatoes
            – slice of turkey
            – 2 tbsp of good bread stuffing
            – tbsp of cranberry sauce
            – tbsp of candied yams
            – tbsp of squash (optional)
            – turkey gravy to desired volume (approx. 1 cup)

            Blend on high until smooth. Enjoy!

          • ISTE says:

            Your “Thanksgiving Especiale Smoothie” sounds like something a traffic accident victim may enjoy.

            Or someone featured over at the Reddit sub place HMFT


          • Octopus says:

            Pumpkin cheesecake with a big dollop of whipped cream is the shizzle, my nizzle. The spices are in there, and the people go nuts. 😋

          • Octopus says:

            My turkey smoothie could keep a sub-Saharan family alive for a week. I figure it’s about 800 calories, and it has all the macros covered. Someday, I intend to make this fantasy a reality.

          • Octopus says:

            I had pumpkin pie for breakfast today, with a little Reddi-Whip. Yum! We never got to cut into it last night, as we had too many dessert choices. ISTE probably had spotted dick, which many English people enjoy.

  25. rightymouse says:

    Good Grief!! 😯 !!!

  26. Octopus says:

    Even though the vaccine doesn’t prevent Covid infection, and vaccinated people are getting it and passing it along, this:

    • ISTE says:

      “If you are gay get the fuck out of my house” would not go down too well methinks.

      What you allow to be injected into your body is your choice, yours alone and nobody should judge you one way or another.

      Where you consensually stick your penis is your choice and yours alone and nobody should judge you.

  27. ISTE says:

    My Christmas shopping just arrived. Six packets of instant mash, ten frozen dinners ( the Banquet cheap shit ) a pound of bacon, bread and eggs.

    No cat food or cat treats needed.

    I always have a month supply of them in case I fall and break a leg.

  28. Octopus says:

    DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old.
    Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus.
    Papa says, ‘If you see it in THE SUN it’s so.’
    Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?


    VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men’s or children’s, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

    Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

    Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that’s no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

    You may tear apart the baby’s rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

    No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

  29. dezzez says:

    Fat fascist wants to harass people over projected snowflakes.

    • Octopus says:

      Try to imagine the vacuum of a life where this is something he chooses to tweet about. This is a person who once owned one of the most valuable pieces of blogosphere real estate extant, and now he’s reduced to babbling about somebody he doesn’t know’s Christmas lights. Imagine if we had known what kind of “intellect”(scare-quotes required by law) this loser really was, at his core, when we were providing him with all the solid conservative content that made him a player. And, as bad as he is, he continues to deteriorate by the day, by the hour. It’s gobsmacking, I tellye!

  30. Abu penis penis penis lol says:

    My Walmart has lots. You are the second person to mention a shortage of it today. Swearzies: until today I didn’t know they carried cream cheese. Bought a tub of Philadelphia whipped for the office.

    Good luck on your trip. You are braver than I am. I don’t trust our government, certainly not others. Enjoy and get home safely!

    • Abu says:

      Rats. Was meant for righty’s cream cheese conundrum.

      • rightymouse says:

        Thanks! It’s been crazy. But we haven’t been back to Thailand since 2019. Hubby’s daughter and 2 grandkids live there. My Dad died there last year & I couldn’t see him. I’d like to visit their graves. Mother died there in 2017.

      • rightymouse says:

        Re: Philadelphia Cream Cheese
        Was able to find some. Thank Gaia!! 🙂
        We always have bagels, cream cheese, smoked salmon, tomatoes available Xmas morning.

  31. Octopus says:

    Just watch the South Park Post-Covid 2021 Special, no matter how you have to obtain it. It’s special. Like the title. 😆

    Someday these guys will get the proper respect they deserve for their commentary on society. Yes, they veer off into insane tangents now and again…who doesn’t? On the whole, they’ve been stellar from the beginning, and survived the Wokeness Pogrom, I don’t know how, because they have violated everything. 😆

  32. rightymouse says:

  33. rightymouse says:

  34. Octopus says:

    Omicron is a cold! 😂

    People have lost their damn minds.

    Shitton of Xanax all around!

  35. rightymouse says:

    So I went to Cleveland Clinic this morning to get my annual boob smashing. 😦
    I’m having a Bloody Mary to soothe myself. 🙂

  36. rightymouse says:

    What a bitch.

  37. rightymouse says:

    Don’t blame you even though I quit smoking 12 years ago.

  38. rightymouse says:

  39. rightymouse says:

    Had more than one Bloody Mary… 😆 😆

  40. dezzez says:

    Those craters in your face don’t make you a planet.

  41. rightymouse says:

    Hubby is conducting tonight. One step-son, wife and granddaughters from out of town will join us for dinner pre-concert. 🙂

  42. rightymouse says:

  43. rightymouse says:

    😆 😆

    • Abu penis penis penis lol says:

      Lol. I first saw this today at Walmart and bought it for my wife. Was looking for a card for sis-in-law but not sure she’d get it.😆

  44. rightymouse says:

    You first, asshole.

  45. dezzez says:

    I find it hard to believe even lardass is this stupid.

  46. Bunk X says:

    • Octopus says:

      Dribbling parsnip! 😂

      That was mortifying. Imagine any other President in history being this messed up, and still in office.

      He really thinks his name is Brandon now. 😱


  47. Octopus says:

    Says the nastiest skank-troll in the Twitterverse. 😂

  48. Octopus says:

    We all agreed to go easy on the Christmas gifts this year. I think the dogs got aholt of the credit cards.

    • Octopus says:

      Amazon effed up their pics site, agin. I’m going to find a better service, manana.

      In the meantime…

      You say that, now. I’m not fully convinced of your sin-cerity. I’m going to watch the rest of your TikTok videos after Christmas, and see.

  49. poteen2 says:

    Son in law ran afoul of the airline mask nazis. He flew to Oregon with his 2 little boys to visit. The only Alaska Air employees still on the job are the vaxxed and masked ones. They got bitchy with his younger son about “properly’ wearing his mask. He got bitchy with them.
    Had to drive back. Canceled his return tickets and banned him. They’ll get a late start on Christmas tomorrow. My ‘non compliant’ grandson is 4.