The Ruse And Fail Of Little Green Footballs Part V – The Turnaround

This is Part 5 of a monograph about a blog named Little Green Footballs and its founder Charles Foster Johnson. Click the links below for related posts. They will be updated as the series continues.
Part 1 – Overview
Part 2 – The Ascendance of Charles Johnson and LGF
Part 3 – The Bannings
Part 4 – The Flounces
Part 5 – The Turnaround
Part 6 – Current Events & The Future Of LGF

Bonus track: Revisiting Rathergate



Up until the election of Barrack Obama in 2008, LGF could still be seen as essentially a conservative blog. Indeed, in blog awards voting, LGF was consistently listed as “conservative” and Johnson voiced no qualms about the distinction.

But a change was in the wind, and in 2008 Johnson became obsessed with religion and “creationism” in particular. At the same time, his posts took a decidedly “anti-Christian” tone. The same fervor with which Johnson once exposed Islamofascism around the globe, he became intent on uncovering the evil ensconced in the Christian belief that God created the heavens and earth, while ignoring the fact that other major religions held similar belief systems.

Johnson ran regular threads about lawmakers wanting to teach creationism in classrooms, with the theme that if this view prevailed and Intelligent Design and/or creationism was even discussed in schoolrooms, the Republic was doomed. While many at LGF agreed with Johnson that creationism or even intelligent design should not be taught in the schools, many were not ready to abandon their own religions and follow the tenets of Darwin. Of the religious frequenters to LGF, most realized that creationism and evolution were not necessarily contradictory.

In Johnson’s view, those who held Judeo-Christian beliefs and accepted creationism as part of their creed were somehow uninformed and ignorant. He dismissed them as “anti-science” or “science deniers,” and began searching for and naming public figures (and other bloggers) in order to label them as creationists. This was another common tactic Johnson used to “win” arguments. No matter how valid a point of discussion was, if it came from a “creationist” it was automatically null and void. The terms “Birther.” “Truther,” “Conspiracy Theorist” and “Climate Denier” were employed in a similar fashion, regardless of the true beliefs of Johnson’s target du jour, and the discussion was settled.

Most could ignore the anti-religion threads and concentrate on the political ones. If one waited long enough, an enterprising member would take it upon him or herself to hijack the comments section and start talking about something else with more widespread interest. While there is no doubt that some members began to visit the site less and less, most were still posting.

After the election of Obama, media reports began to signal the “end” of the conservative movement – the Republican Party was dead and liberalism was on the rise. It is unclear whether Johnson feared that the right-wing blogosphere was truly doomed or he had finally found an opportunity to get off the conservative train he had been riding since 11 September 2001. In any case he made a tight U-turn, on not only conservative values, but also the on the conservative base on his blog. More invisible eggshells and tripwires were scattered around the Little Green Footballs play room.

Johnson announced that he’d had a change of heart on many things – global warming, the war in Iraq, and Islam. Most notably, he demolished his relationship with other bloggers. He and Pamela Gellar engaged in a very public blogwar about his characterization of the members of anti-Jihad movements in Europe. Geller, who had actually met and spoken with these individuals in person, pointed out to Johnson his characterizations were wrong. Johnson didn’t attend, but he claimed to know all about it, and that everyone who did attend was wrong.

So Pamela Geller (who once referred to Johnson as her “blog daddy”) was banned. Posters on LGF who defended Geller were banned. Posters on LGF who complained about the bannings were banned.

More importantly, Johnson began to link and source outlets he had previously disparaged. Daily KOS, Huffington Post, Media Matters, Think Progress – these were his new blog sources. Johnson worked overtime trying to ingratiate himself with the left. But if Johnson thought he was going to re-invent himself as a liberal force in the blogosphere, he was sadly mistaken. This was an arena that was full of blogs that already had their street cred and had no need for Johnson or LGF. Indeed, they didn’t trust him, and for good reason. Most recognized him for what he is: an opportunist.

But Johnson got sloppy. At first glance, it appears that he could not be bothered to get real news stories anymore. Most of his posts were not informative – they were merely Johnson howling at the right. Either he had somehow convinced himself that he and he alone was the responsible for the greatness of LGF, or he deluded himself into believing he was a man of great political thinking and acumen.

Neither was true. Today, Little Green Footballs is a shadow of its former self, populated only with “yes” men and women who serve only to tell Johnson how great he is and to apologize for the pokes the blogosphere takes at him. But there are several events that illustrate the intellectual bankruptcy of LGF and also accelerated its decline.

The Midnight Raid of Killgore Trout.

In the wee hours of September 18, 2009, prolific LGF poster and moderator Killgore Trout ventured over to the Hot Air website and committed what has gone down as one of the most atrocious acts in the history of the blogosphere. Using his LGF “nic,” Trout went Moby [1], and posted a racist rant on a “dead” thread, liberally sprinkling his comments with the use of the “N” word. He was shouted down and disparaged by others on the blog, and no one defended his racist comments.

Trout returned to LGF and waited a few hours for his posts to be scrubbed. When they were not, he proclaimed that the moderators at Hot Air condoned racism because they had done nothing about removal of his vulgar comments. Of course, at the time the comments were made, Hot Air’s moderators were asleep. They removed Trout’s vulgar comments as soon as they viewed them.[2]

Read that last paragraph again. More of Johnson’s YESBUT.

When discovered, Trout’s actions were the subject of outrage, not only on Hot Air and other blogs, but even on Little Green Footballs. Johnson, in a post later that morning, made more excuses for Trout’s bragging.

That “very serious problem” was created by Killgore Trout, and supported by Charles Johnson.

So, what was the point? The moderators at Hot Air scrubbed the comments once they saw them. It is telling that Johnson neither apologized to the owners of Hot Air for the Trout’s moby attack nor was he banned for this outrageous behavior. Apparently, Johnson’s true concern was that somehow he would be blamed for Trout’s actions – and he was. The incident raised a serious question: Knowing Johnson’s penchant to ban posters who step out of line, why did Killgore Trout feel safe in his enterprise? Johnson claimed ignorance of Trout’s actions, but subsequently found validity in the use of the most disgusting racial epithets in order to discredit other bloggers more popular and successful than he.

To their credit, others on that LGF thread expressed their disgust. They were promptly banned and their comments deleted. [3] In an open letter to Johnson, blogger Jay Tea of Wizbang responded:

“In case it escaped your memory, I commented on Killgore Trout’s midnight raid on Hot Air. I found what he did incredibly disgusting and morally repugnant, and knowing that he was one of your trusted “monitor lizards,” I knew where I could find him to tell him so.

In that thread, I very carefully abided by every single one of your stated comments policies. I did not violate a single one of them.

Oh, but I sure as hell broke your unwritten, unpublished, unacknowledged rules. Cheerfully, in fact. I confronted and denounced one of your chosen pets, and called upon you to equally enforce other of your unpublished rules — mainly, the one where your commenters are held accountable for what they do on other sites.

To no great surprise, I was banned and my comments were deleted.” [4]

Indeed, Johnson later defended Killgore Trout’s subterfuge with the argument that he’d posted the offensive comments on Hot Air under his real name and not a sock. (Nevermind that the perpetrator’s “real name” is a misspelling of the name of a recurring character in Kurt Vonnegut novels.) [5]

Because of Killgore Trout’s astroturfing, Johnson and his minions were accused of publishing all sorts of racist comments at Fox News and other blogs as evidence of the racism and bigotry of the right. The fact that these comments were often found by Killgore Trout and brought back to LGF as trophies led to speculation that he himself had planted them. After all, he’d done it before with no consequence and with the tacit approval of Charles Johnson. Vile comments posted at left-wing sites like Daily Kos or the Huffington Post were conveniently ignored.

As stated before, the “Yes But” argument is classic Johnson. “Yes, it’s not true, but it should be.” Although he denied culpability while supporting Killgore’s stunt, he advocated astroturfing elsewhere.

Evidence of Charles Johnson’s minions’ astroturfing was exposed on where reviews were posted of a book by Pamela Geller and Robert Spencer that had not been released to the public. Did Johnson do it himself? Of course not, yet he dropped loud hints to his lizards, who subsequently bragged about it.[6]

Why would a 60 years old man care that former protégé Pamela Geller was successful enough to write and publish a book that had nothing to do with Charles Johnson or Little Green Footballs and attempt to undermine her achievement by sending his minions to deliberately sabotage reviews on Amazon? Pure ego-centric petulance. It didn’t affect Geller’s book sales, but it did expose Johnson’s irrational propensity for petty tyranny.

Publishing Personal Information

Occasionally there were those who spoke their opinions to Charles Johnson. A common retort from Johnson was, “If you don’t like it here, go start your own blog.”

Several took Johnson’s advice and never looked back. For the handful who dared to stare into the rear view mirror, Johnson demonized them as “stalkers,” and falsely claimed that the websites of the banned were infested with viruses and spyware. Johnson needed to keep his fans from venturing away from Little Green Footballs and finding out the truth – that he’d made it all up.

One of those blogs had the audacity to call their new website “LGF2.0” (later renamed “The Blogmocracy”). In retaliation, Johnson published the real names of former LGF-registered commenters “Rodan,” “Savage” and “M,” a serious breach of internet protocol, courtesy and manners, and he did it out of spite, merely because they disagreed with his opinions. Their comments, like those of many others, were cleansed from Little Green Footballs.

Indeed, Charles Johnson went so far as to register “Little Green Footballs” as a trademark in order to shut down the blog known as “LGF2.0.” [7]

While Johnson claimed to have the information on all three from other sources, One commenter’s personal information could have come from only one source – the PayPal account from which she hit Johnson’s “tip jar.” Johnson was again seen as an untrustworthy individual having broken a cardinal rule of the blogosphere – thou shalt not publish people’s personal information without their permission. The result is that Johnson’s desperate pleas to “hit the tip jar” went unheeded by a lot of his remaining fans.

The Tennessee State Flag

If being considered untrustworthy wasn’t bad enough, Johnson found himself looking ridiculous due to his utter lack of research and fact-check skills. On 28 March 2010 he stated in his near-daily “TEA Party Racism” thread the following:

The flag in question, the one he was so sure was a neo-Nazi flag, is the State Flag of Tennessee. In his desire to find Nazis and racism everywhere, he became the same sort of ill-informed conspiracy theorist that he himself despised.

The Obama Flag

Just a few years prior to misidentifying the Tennessee State Flag, Charles Johnson posted this gem:

Charles Johnson missed the memo that Barrack Obama was campaigning in Ohio at the time. With regards to recognizing State Flags, Conservative Charles was just as ignorant as Liberal Charles.

Weinergate and The New York Menu Board

Although by now Johnson had severed ties with Andrew Breitbart (despite the fact that Breitbart introduced him to the people of Pajamas Media) he announced that he had proof that Breitbart lied about only showing Anthony Weiner’s photos to news producers. Breitbart admitted showing the photos to radio personalities Opie and Anthony and to Ann Coulter but denied publicizing them.

Then Johnson claimed that Breitbart lied about keeping Weiner’s photos private, and for proof posted a photo of Coulter’s supposed reaction outside a Manhattan restaurant – taken right after she viewed the photos from the open laptop to her left. Johnson pointedly says “Ann Coulter is not a news producer,” ergo, Breitbart lied. [8]

Although he wasn’t there, Charles Johnson described the scene:

In fact, two nights ago, Andrew Breitbart went out drinking with Anthony and several others — and according to Anthony, showed the picture to numerous people, even leaving his laptop computer unattended with the picture on the screen for long periods of time.

One of those people was right wing flamethrower Ann Coulter. Here’s Anthony’s photo of Coulter reacting to the picture; notice that his computer is apparently there, but Breitbart is nowhere to be seen.

The open laptop in question was a menu board in front of the restaurant, as evidenced by photos taken of the same location in daylight.[9] Johnson to this day maintains it was a laptop. But more to the point, Johnson mischaracterized Breitbart’s statement regarding the showing of the photos to news producers. Blogger Patterico nailed Johnson on his selective editing of Breitbart’s statement:

On his blog, Johnson posted this quote from Breitbart:

“…it was necessary to show the pictures I had received from our source to several news producers, including several at major news networks, to prove that the additional material I described really did exist, which some have continued to doubt.”

Oh wait! Chuckles did some selective editing. Here’s the whole quote.

“Prior to the publication of our story on and this past Monday morning, it was necessary to show the pictures I had received from our source to several news producers, including several at major news networks, to prove that the additional material I described really did exist, which some have continued to doubt.

Oh, wait – that’s not a policy. That’s explaining what happened before the story even broke.”

The Accusation of TEA Party Murder of a US Census worker

On 24 September 2009, a man was found hung, with the word “FED” scrawled upon his chest. Johnson insinuated that a TEA Party member killed US Census worker William Edwin Sparkman Jr. in Kentucky after a Glenn Beck Rally, when in fact the death was a suicide.[10]

MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow presented the unsubstantiated rumor as a likely scenario, and Charles Johnson promoted the lie, months before the facts of the death were known. The results of the investigation determined that Sparkman committed suicide, but staged it to appear to be a murder such that his family could collect on a life insurance policy.

Not even the liberal LA Times bought into the story, yet Charles Johnson did.

These are not the only examples of Johnson’s slanted egregious “reporting” on Little Green Footballs.[11] Contrary to his claim that his Little Green Footballs is a “news aggregator” (as stated in his application for trademark registry) Johnson does little more than cut and paste the latest memes, often verbatim, from left wing media sources with little or no background fact checking. That seems to be fine with his fan base of unquestioning sycophants hanging out at Little Green Footballs.

[Caveat: In no way is this monograph comprehensive, nor is it intended to defame or otherwise impugn Charles Johnson, Little Green Footballs or anyone associated with any blog. Any and all conjecture should be intuitively obvious to the casual observer. This is not Wikipedia; however, if any readers find fault with this monograph, please leave comments with verifiable backup and we’ll correct factual errors.]

[Coming up: Part 6 – Current Events & The Future of LGF]

[1] From Urban Dictionary: Moby – An insidious and specialized type of left-wing troll who visits blogs and impersonates a conservative for the purpose of either spreading false rumors intended to sow dissension among conservative voters, or who purposely posts inflammatory and offensive comments for the purpose of discrediting the blog in question.

[2] “Indeed, one of Johnson’s buddies (with whom he is still friendly) actually admitted planting racist comments at Hot Air in 2009. Specifically, in September 2009, trusted LGF Lieutenant Killgore Trout went over to Hot Air in the middle of the night to plant some racist comments. Ace described what happened.” “Charles Johnson, An Unlikely Crusader Against Racist Comments” Patterico, 15 April 2012

[3] Here is the link to the comments. Note the abnormally large number of deleted comments.

[4] Jay Tea, Wizbang “I Will Not Poke Lizards With Sticks. I Will Not Poke Lizards With Sticks.” 2 March 2010 Quote: “Congratulations are in order. I have now joined the illustrious club of ‘People Charles Johnson Has Lied About.'”

[5] “Kilgore Trout” entry in Wikipedia

[6] “Charles Johnson’s Flying Monkeys Astroturf Amazon Again”

[7] U.S. Patent andTrademark Office, registration for “Little Green Footballs.”

[8] In fact, the engineers of the Opie and Anthony Show, unbeknownst to Breitbart, captured the image via a live camera in the recording studio and “scooped” Breitbart, thus forcing Breitbart’s hand. This is not conjecture, as it was confirmed by Opie and Anthony as well.

[9] “LGF Is Actually Hallucinating On #Weinergate” Patterico, 11 June 2008.

[10] “The Death of Bill Sparkman” Wikipedia.

[11] Charles Johnson’s “reporting” of the Zimmerman Martin case before the facts were released is too long to post here. He went so far as to claim Zimmerman was a white racist who was not injured in the altercation that resulted in Martin’s death. None of Johnson’s allegations have been proven to be true.

91 Comments on “The Ruse And Fail Of Little Green Footballs Part V – The Turnaround”

  1. Pakimon says:

    This gets better and better.

    Thanks for providing the link that actually showed Killgore’s racist rants at HotAir.

    It definitely reinforced my opinion that Killgore is a f**king shitheel.

    The endless bleats of “where are the moderators?!” laced in with the racist rants reeked of Chunky.

    How would you like it if some punkass bitch spray painted “I HATE (insert N-Bomb Here)S!!” on the front of your house in the middle of the night while you were asleep and then stood on your front lawn in the morning pointing and screaming “RACIST!!” ?

    Fuck Killgore. Fuck him with Asswhistle’s strap-on.

    Sorry for leading off this thread with a rant but that kind of behavior really pisses me off.

    For those who are tempted to “cut Killgore some slack” because of his low-key defiance of The fat Cheetos eating pony-tailed blogger as of late. I’d suggest you go read the links provided above.

    It’s my opinion that the only reason Killgore is “acting out” is because he’s been shoved aside and lost his status as “trusted lieutenant/moderator” at The Bog.

    The Chunkster considered him too tainted to continue in such a role so Killgore was stripped of his power and reduced to being a lowly minion.

    In Chunky’s mind, Killgore was an imbecile for posting his racist rants under his “real name” and thereby allowing the “mobying” to be easily traced back to The Bog and Chunky himself.

    If not for that one stupid mistake, Killgore would still be an ardent cheerleader of “all things Chunky” and still be riding high atop the LGF scrotum pole instead of being at the bottom and subject to chastisement by morons like Gus 802.

    Just throwing in my 3 1/2 cents….

    • Medchemmer says:

      I agree about Killgore. In my mind rooting for him on LGF now is like rooting for one of Hitler’s subversive subordinates.

      • Minnow says:

        The guy is an arrogant dickhead and has always been so. He has, for no reason other than the fact that he can, started shit with numerous posters – bullying them because he knows he holds a special place on that blog and is untouchable. Now, he has lost that coveted position and I hope he falls on his face.

        He deserves nothing but scorn.

      • rightymouse says:

        Amen, Minnow. He helped make LGF what it is today. He can reap what he has sown. Oh, and Killgore!! Yoohoo! You still know sh*t about economics among other subjects. Stick to kale & frogs, dude. You’ll be a hit at parties. 🙄

  2. SpaceAllah says:

    Thing is he claims he was “duped” by everyone. If that’s your premise then it leads one to consider why someone who is so easily befuddled and manipulated could be someone whose judgment you would trust? Weak minded and weak willed people get “duped.” So he’s admitting to the world he isn’t bright enough for true critical thinking. Taking the better part of a decade to admit you were “duped” is even worse. Slower than slow.

    So if you’re that fuckin stupid why would anyone care what your half-watt opinion might be then Sparky? Moron. You’re a joke in every possible way. Do yourself a favor: shut up, shut your site down, and finish fading away with some semblance of dignity.

  3. OLT's Nautical Lore says:

    I liked Stalker Charles’ mid-turn position, in which Crayshunists were in league with Islamist fundies! Yes, for one bright shining moment, Stalker Charles had it all linked together. Why, even they didn’t know they were sekritly allied … it’s like Obama and Egypt.

    But, like a floundering and leaking supertanker off a California coastline, his position slowly drifted so that now he embraces Islamist crayshunists, but not Christian ones. Because racism.

    That’s the kind of deep thinking that only happens at the end of a Cheetos binge, when he accidentally hoists the wrong Mountain Dew bottle.

    • snowcrash says:

      If he added Freemasons or UFO’s to that Creationist/Islamist grouping I might have been interested.

    • OLT's Algae-Hebraic Prufe says:

      Oh, he’s already tied his expansive ass to Trooferism. If you use his patented guilt-by-association method, that is. Stalker Charles has a Twitter buddy (Mo Ansar, IIRC) who is that rarest of rarities (I kid!), an Islamist troofer. Surprise! And Stalker Charles was practically licking the hem of his hand-tailored robe (whether it was the hem he lightly beats his wives with I have no idea).

      It was disgusting in its own special way.

      But funny, because by Stalker Charles rules, this friendship makes Stalker Charles a Troofer.

  4. A Guy With Actual Degrees in Hard Sciences says:

    Not one microinch of slack for Kilgore. No one there is any less deserving of it than he.

  5. garycooper says:

    It should be noted, in regards to Weinergate, that Chunky tried to insert himself into the story by saying, “I own lots of gray boxer briefs, though they’re all hole-y and stained from years of filthy hygiene. I can’t rightly say that isn’t my medium-sized weiner in those photographs, which were sexted to that girl across the country. I send pictures of my weiner out all the time to unsuspecting girls I meet on the internet.” I’m paraphrasing, but that was the gist.

    In regards to Chunky’s imbibing of his own precious bodly fluids, he had the following to say:

    “Necessary? Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine?
    Probably not, no, but I do it anyway because it’s sterile and I like the taste.”

  6. Arachne says:

    And of course just yesterday we got the word that he was fooled by a satire story on Paul Ryan. When pointed out, he still refused to back down.

    To steal from the late comedian George Carlin, I have to wonder if when asked his Occupation, he replies: FOOLE.

  7. buzzsawmonkey says:

    Having actually coined and popularized the term “flounce” over at LGF—and having established it in a verse which lurks somewhere in my archives from the pre-Iceweasel Age—I confess to a slight pique that my own leavetaking from LGF did not rate mention in the “flounce” section of this monograph.

    That leavetaking, titled “Your Last Posting,” appears in the second of these threads. It was posted at Blogmocracy and at Zombietime, not at LGF; I did not want to give Mad King Yertle the pleasure of deleting it. In retaliation, Yertle not only blocked my account, but erased over 45,000 posts, and one of the highest positive “karma counts” that LGF had.

    • Minnow says:

      To have deleted your posts demonstrates Chunky Pastyface’s complete breakdown and mental disintegration thoroughly.

      You were a cornerstone there with your wit and insight. I always looked forward to your posts, and always laughed. Who couldn’t?

      Then, one day, Chunky fell off his bicycle, turned jealous and flew into a rage.

      And he is still flying high on that trip.

    • Bunk X says:

      buzz– There were many great flounces both on and off LGF. As this series was going up we realized that although The Bannings were covered, The Flounces were not.
      Cato’s classic was a given, and Earth2Moonbat’s (Snork’s) was chosen for the length, wit and links.

  8. Speranza says:

    “But Johnson got sloppy. At first glance, it appears that he could not be bothered to get real news stories anymore. Most of his posts were not informative – they were merely Johnson howling at the right.”
    That pretty much says it all about post-2008 LGF.

    • Arachne says:

      Personally, I’d love to see the Sharmuta “I’m so sorry, Charles.” post count. In the hundreds no doubt.

      • garycooper says:

        And every doleful apology she made, for the coldness and hurty-ness of this mean old world, was a classic of brevity and twit.

  9. pat says:

    I was banned at 2:00 AM being long in bed. My apparent sin was not to get upset about creationism and actually be questioned by CJ in the chat room about the issue, after all what harm do they do, and laugh at the silly global warming hysteria.

  10. term paper says:

    Great blog article about this topic, I have been lately in your blog once or twice now. I just wanted to say my thanks for the information provided here.

  11. Pakimon says:

    Is this the 47% Romney was talking about? 😆

  12. Pakimon says:

    Sports Illustrated gave a phone shaped like a sneaker.

  13. Bunk X says:

    Here’s Buzzsaw’s flounce.
    Your Last Posting
    (Los Angeles)

    –apologies to Robert Browning and “My Last Duchess”

    That’s your last posting ever on this blog,

    And henceforth your account is blocked. You’ll dog

    My site no further with your words; your nic
Is banished, and I gave your posts the stick.

    You know I’ll call your banning here a “flounce”
    Though I’ve been waiting for some time to pounce
    On your account, and with prevarications
    Distort and demonize your observations.
    The Toad Hall where you reveled, if you please’ll
    Be given entire to the stoats and weasels,
My countenance beaming on each one that
    Comes to me bearing tales of Mole or Rat,

    Or Badger, or…sockpuppet. No, ‘t was not

    This writing only, placed you on the spot

    And caused me to invoke the ban: perhaps

    You chanced to differ with my own claptrap
    And stick to your position, or dispute
    Conventional wisdoms to which repute

    I’ve lately granted. Don’t you dare to say

    That I or my site might have lost their way
    Obsessing on my personal vendettas;
I am neither forgiving nor forgetter,

    And will not brook a failure of obesiance

    By anyone I feel owes me allegiance.
    Yes, I took Rather down, on grounds that he
    Could not support what he claimed factually;
    But now I set my sights at lower bar
    (On personalities, not things that are)
    While I squat ‘midst the wreckage I have made
    Like mad Kurtz ruling from his bush stockade,
    Ringed ’round with skulls. For I no longer deign
    To weigh a fact itself; instead, maintain

    That source determines truth, and to that end
    The nature of veracity I bend,
    Citing to midden-heaps of rankness such

    That I would not long since have scorned to touch.

    A turtle is a lizard in a shell,
    And I, lord of my self-created hell

    Remain King Yertle of the Turtle Stack
Exalted on my Posting Turtles’ backs–
    Yet conscious, as I proclaim my renown
It’s just posting turtles, all the way down,
Which is why I respond with rage and fear

    Should anyone mouth what I deem a sneer

    Or contradiction. So I flip a switch,
    And all posts stop together, with a bitch

    Given reign of my elegant designs.

    Yet, if I still retained but half a spine

    I would despise appearing to be led

    As I now seem to, by the lesser head.

    Hark! Look you! See how Glenn Beck weeps!

    Do you not loathe the company he keeps
    Regardless of whatever he might say?
    Here is the global warming word today; 

    Do not dissent, the banning stick is toward
    I care for no voice save that of accord!

  14. garycooper says:

    That was a gem, Buzz. 😆

    Nobody at the swamp understands meter anymore… 😦

  15. garycooper says:

    Psst! Hey, Fatass…got the perfect nontroversy for you to get all 180 on, here. The wingnuts will be in a dither, and it’s all profit for you, if you buy in early and stay late.–election.html

    It’s just like when Breitbart hacked Weiner’s Twitter account, only even more heinous. Don’t wait on this! I hear Ace is already trying to rile up his base…

  16. dwells38 says:

    Minnow :The guy is an arrogant dickhead and has always been so. He has, for no reason other than the fact that he can, started shit with numerous posters – bullying them because he knows he holds a special place on that blog and is untouchable. Now, he has lost that coveted position and I hope he falls on his face.
    He deserves nothing but scorn.

    I judge people by how they treat me. Like Chunkles himself, when Cato had a choice to politely disagree or flame me like a fucking dick, he chose the latter. I don’t have a use for him but he’s Albutsteve’s friend so I’d probably tolerate him here, assuming he was just trying to impress his master.

    • rightymouse says:

      Eh. If Albusteve is a friend of KT’s then I suspect he’ll warn him in advance of the kind of reception he’d have here.

      • Pakimon says:

        I think KT already knows.

        Amazing how his status plummeted from being a top “lizardoid” to lowly bottom feeder in three short years.

        At least he has Dork_Falcon for company. 😆

    • Bunk X says:

      Cato was here for a time, and he started chilling, but he couldn’t get over his hatred of Daedalus.

  17. dwells38 says:

    Arachne :That was the title of Carlin’s album — “I always spell it with the extra E just to piss people off.”

    Ah yes, best known for being the father of modern philosophical comedy, else known as Carlinism or Absurdism and expressed in the philosophical statement “I think I am, therefore I am. I think.”

    He was a heavily influenced by an earlier philosopher, Redd Foxx who made the rational observation “Show me a man who’s never said the word fuck, and I’ll show you a man who’s never slammed his hand in a car door”

  18. Pakimon says:

    New Obama Campaign Ad Uses Mitt Romney’s Own Words 4 hours ago

    I’m sure that ad used this classic editing technique.

  19. sven10077 says:

    Yeah I’m a huge fan of Kilgore Guppy myself. I was so pissed off at HA’s caving to Bikeboy at all and granting him the heckler’s veto I pushed the limit and got banned on purpose. If CJ and KT are the answer it’s a pretty stupid goddamned question.

    • Arachne says:

      Really? Check out That’s what Obama calls it. Leave it to the narcissist in chief to take a program using taxpayer money and rename it after him. The insane gimmie gimmie woman believes OBAMA gave it her.

  20. poteen2 says:

    The Truth About the ‘Free Obama Phone’
    Laughing @ GOP Partisans
    Daniel Ballardrssfollow me on twitter
    Politics • Sep 27, 2012 at 2:08 pm PDT • Views: 217

    The Truth About the Obama Phone

    The video has captured the attention of the right online, who see it as proof that Obama supporters are dependent on government. On his show today, Rush Limabugh weighed in:

    So these are the people that don’t like Romney because of what he said about 47%? No, these are the 47%!… She knows. She knows how to get this free Obama phone. She knows everything about it. She may not know who George Washington is or Abraham Lincoln, but she knows how to get an Obama phone.

    Thousands of conservatives are on Twitter, telling jokes about the #ObamaPhone.

    There is one problem with the Obama Phone: It doesn’t exist.

    Since 2009, there has been an urban myth that Obama created a program to provide free phones to low-income Americans at taxpayer expense. There is, in fact, a government program that will provide low-income people with a free or low cost cell phone. It was started in 2008 under George W. Bush.

    Bush did it.

    • garycooper says:

      It sure would be great to talk to that nice lady on the phone. About politics, or whatever. She has a very soothing voice, that’s frankly kind of a turn-on.

    • Stonemason says:

      Someone needs to tell that woman she has a hybrid Reagan (who started the program for landlines)/Bush (who expanded to cell)Phone

    • Pakimon says:

      Tell that to the nitwit honking in that video.

      You’re liable to be labeled a RACIST for trying to steal Obama’s phone thunder.

      • garycooper says:

        Making fun of Obamaphone Lady involves a number of discriminatory styles. Racist, for sure…that’s obvious and easy, since she’s African-American. She’s also fat, ugly, stupid and drunk, so check off the appropriate boxes on my judgemental scorecard. Oh, and she’s apparently a woman, so be sure to note my misogyny.

  21. garycooper says:

    It should be noted that Charles Johnson, since parting ways with the Right, has quit riding his bike, indulged in far too many salty, fatty snacks and sugary drinks, and gained a massive amount of weight. Penis penis penis LOL.

    • Abu dew Mountain says:

      And he likely drank a substantial amount of his own urine via his Dew-Port-A-Bottles. < TM trademark thingy above. Rats.

      penis penis penis lol – gotta hold second place!

  22. garycooper says:

    Killgore Trout called Moochelle “A Wookie,” and that was very rude and racist. To my knowledge, the fictional beings from “Star Wars” called “Wookies” do not possess Steatopygous characteristics, and therefore this characterization is specious.

  23. garycooper says:

    The First Lady does, however, make mooing sounds like a heifer. Quite often, and loudly. Therefore, the appellation “Moochelle” is appropriate. Penis penis penis LOL.

  24. garycooper says:

    She might just be in need of a good milking.

  25. ironyman says:

    35 Dark_Falcon
    Thu, Sep 27, 2012 2:22:21pm replyquote 0downupreport

    re: #33 makeitstop

    I’m convinced that David Horowitz waved bye-bye to his sanity some time ago.

    As am I. His site went sharply downhill in 2008 and by mid-2009 was unreadable.
    36 HappyWarrior
    Thu, Sep 27, 2012 2:23:10pm replyquote 1downupreport

    re: #34 Someone Please Beam Me Up!

    I’d say it caused him to abandon the wingnut left for the wingnut right.

    Yep he went from being one kind of extremist nutjob to another kind. Horowitz would be the same obnoxious asshole he is today if he had remained a far leftist. It’s just who he is.

    • Arachne says:

      I’m sure David Horowitz is worried what a twit on a dying blog thinks of him.

    • ElSuerte says:

      “His site went sharply downhill in 2008 and by mid-2009 was unreadable.”

      Funny how that matches the period when LGF went full tilt to the left.

      It’s like relativistic motion, but in politics.

      • garycooper says:

        Good point. My Dad used to say, “It’s all relative,” all the time. He was right. It’s amazing how right he was, about almost everything, when I thought he was a clueless square for years.

      • Bunk X says:

        Lol. I thought that quote came from this post. Fits.

  26. Minnow says:

    Hey Dark Fowlcum 47-percenter.

    Go fuck yourself.

  27. garycooper says:

    The idea of any of those imbeciles at LGF ripping on the likes of David Horowitz is too precious for words. 😆

    Hey, idiots…read his books and learn about why he evolved his thinking, from his communist-raised, know-nothing, hippie-radical young self to the mature, rational, brilliant conservative he has become. He’s very honest and thorough in his biographical works, as in his other work. The fact that you can’t stand to read his site just shows how lost you are.

    Note: Start with “Radical Son.”

  28. Pakimon says:

    I predict that on the evening of Nov. 6th, 2012, a strange sound will roll across the landscape.

    It’ll sound like the Jolly Green Giant has a huge sheet of bubble wrap and popping each bubble as fast as he can…. 😉

  29. garycooper says:

    If the cops find Hoffa’s body under that driveway tomorrow morning, I will eat my bullet-riddled fedora, and post the video on youtube. It’s absurd, and looks like some kind of distraction. But from what? The Kwame Kilpatrick thuggery/racketeering trial? The presidential election (future thuggery/racketeering trial material)? Current celebrity gossip?

    Penis penis penis LOL.

    • Abu Davis Love III says:

      I’ve always opined Hoffa was mixed in w/ sausage/hot dog to ensure no remains were found. I also I thought Geraldo Rivers would find cool stuff in Capone’s non-vault. D’oh!
      Any Ryder Cup junkies here?

      • garycooper says:

        Kowalski Sausage is a popular local brand. Yum!

        Or, they just gave the body to the Chinese, for the “Long Pork Lo Mein” pot. Who doesn’t love Chinese?

      • poteen2 says:

        Story I heard back in the day was the Kal Kan factory was the favored disposal method at the time. Heard it from a Mafia Teamster so it must be true.

  30. garycooper says:

    NO! You’re jinxing them!

    They aren’t in the playoffs, yet. It looks pretty good right now, but let’s not get cocky. Sure, if they make it in, the Yankees will be crapping themselves at the prospect of another quick exit…pitching trumps slugging in the playoffs, and they know it. The Tigs can wreak havoc in the playoffs, but only if they get in. Anything can happen.

    • Abu Jake Peavy says:

      The Sox fans on Chicago sports radio are fatalistic, well the upbeat ones are. The Sox walked 12 – twelve last night. Update: Sox lose!

    • Bunk X says:

      A caller to Rush said he saw this woman in Toledo, that there’s about 55 people being shuttled around by bus to protest Romney. I want a Bama foe, too, but I gotta chine up.
      Obama’s Twitter thingy threw her under the bus earlier today, as da free foes have nothing to do with the campaign.

  31. Liz_Ardoid says:

    • ISpeakJive says:

      Oh, come on. They are not savages. They are wonderful, loving brown people who can’t help themselves.


  32. haysoos says:

    rightymouse :
    Eh. If Albusteve is a friend of KT’s then I suspect he’ll warn him in advance of the kind of reception he’d have here.

    I was friends with KT on a blog but have no personal contact or any intention to contact him….what’s past is over, I never got into all the relationships, how they worked or what became of anyone except Walter and Cato who both approached me for my addy…if other people have problems, it’s none of my affair nor my place to judge, and I have no inclination to protect anybody disliked by others…I do dislike a couple of people and I’ve told them so and the reasons why…other than that I keep my head down and just post…if people don’t like Killgore, it’s no skin off my back…I’ve learned a few things here about people that surprised me since at the time I was not paying any attention to that aspect of lgf…I like being neutral

  33. Mr. Tibbs says:

    When KT was a monitor at LGF, he gleefully participated in the targeting of various posters and working to get them banned just cause they did not kiss the ring of Fatass. He is one of the natsty creeps who emailed behind the scenes to get up wolf packs to gang up on targeted posters. He is coward and a back stabbing son of a bitch.

    And he is an idiot about economics too.